>
> You know what's fucking twisted? When I was a kid I had a pet turtle. I named it
> Tuttle after the bricks I used to hold the aquarium's lid shut. You heard me
> right. A goddam brick. Know why? My mom wouldn't let me keep it in the house(cuz
> you know if they get in the walls then they infestate). I knew it was a dumbass
> idea but I don't own the frickin' house. Tuttle stayed outside.
>
> Well one fantastic summer morning I woke up and came out to feed Tuttle. The lid
> was knocked off and Tuttle was no where to be seen. Searching around in my
> relatively small backyard I spotted him a few feet away in the grass. Some local
> predator(skunks galore and a bunch of racoons) had found it's way into the
> aquarium. Thinkin' that he just got rattled I picked him up. I started to lift
> him when I'd noticed that his shell was cracked. JEEZUS H CHRIST ALMIGHTY! I
> could see his fucking insides moving and shit bubbling and pulsating. Fighting
> nasuea with tear filled eyes I began to inspect the damage. Both his front claws
> had been ripped right out leaving only bloody stumps that wiggled in vane
> attempts to regain control of the recently departed limbs. The likely attacker
> was trying it's hardest to get at some fresh meat. It's shell had been deeply
> scratched with multiple chew marks all over it. SO deep that the shell itself
> was bleeding. So much for protection.
>
> I knew that thing had to die. There's no fucking veterinary clinic for ruptured
> turtle shells in my town so I knew I had to make it quick and painless. My
> mother aka mother nature wouldn't let me kill him saying it was disgusting and
> inhuman(again she is looking out for everyone's best interest). So I watched him
> suffer all day. Coudln't leave him for a second. I watched til the last bubble
> came out of his nose and Tuttle was no more. I cried for the rest of the day and
> wouldn't even talk to my mother for weeks.
>
> I learned a valuable lesson. If you have a kid then just let him fucking keep a
> pet in the house, ok asshole? Spare him the mind bending afternoon of torture
> and mental decomposition. It's just a goddam turtle.
>
> RIP Crapatorium
>
> pixel-eight.com
>