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SubjectWhat is really important. new Reply to this message
Posted byn2locarz
Posted on08/04/06 01:37 AM



He guys. Haven't been here for a few weeks. Through the years I come and go. I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful women - my soulmate. I have 3 wonderful kids. At the beginning of this year I burried myself in work (started a company). I thought that if I could complete this one project, I could put our family ahead financially. While it might have done that, about two weeks ago, I learned that my wife has lost here love for me. She met a guy at her work and they have grown very close. I don't think she has cheated on me, but she does love him. Boy has this really put things in perspective for me. I love her more than anything - I am heartbroken. I left my 9-5 job at IBM last week so that I can focus on this. Everyday I focus on her and my kids. I am doing everything I can to win her back. I consider myself a christian. I found god years ago but fell away since I thought I didn't need him. Since this has started, he brought me to my knees. I am not preeching to you about finding god. I pray everyday. Since this started, I would say that things are getting better. She is staying at home and even sleeps in my bed with me. We spent the day together. It was awesome. It's been so rough, I sometimes wish I could just leave. The though of her and this other guy makes my stomach ache. She will not admitt to this guy - guess she thinks it will hurt me too much. I don't know who he is but I know she works with him and he is married with 3 kids. What an asshole. Not only is he beening unfaithful and destroying his marriage, but he is trying to destroy ours also. I would love to find him. I wouldn't hurt him, but I bet his wife would love to know about all of this. I consider myself a lucky guy. None of my friends or close family members have every passed away. I have never had a girl break my heart. I have to say this is the worst pain I have ever experienced. I have found something so important that I will never stop fighting for it. She is the one. I know that.

n2




SubjectPreach on brother new Reply to this message
Posted byitchyNADZ
Posted on08/04/06 09:18 AM



I know what it feels like.

The ex-GF and I are starting to get back together but now I wonder - will she do the same crap down the road? What about after we'd married? Trust is something you must have, without question. Love can't even make up for it.





> He guys. Haven't been here for a few weeks. Through the years I come and go.
> I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful women - my soulmate. I have 3
> wonderful kids. At the beginning of this year I burried myself in work (started
> a company). I thought that if I could complete this one project, I could put
> our family ahead financially. While it might have done that, about two weeks
> ago, I learned that my wife has lost here love for me. She met a guy at her
> work and they have grown very close. I don't think she has cheated on me, but
> she does love him. Boy has this really put things in perspective for me. I
> love her more than anything - I am heartbroken. I left my 9-5 job at IBM last
> week so that I can focus on this. Everyday I focus on her and my kids. I am
> doing everything I can to win her back. I consider myself a christian. I found
> god years ago but fell away since I thought I didn't need him. Since this has
> started, he brought me to my knees. I am not preeching to you about finding
> god. I pray everyday. Since this started, I would say that things are getting
> better. She is staying at home and even sleeps in my bed with me. We spent the
> day together. It was awesome. It's been so rough, I sometimes wish I could
> just leave. The though of her and this other guy makes my stomach ache. She
> will not admitt to this guy - guess she thinks it will hurt me too much. I don't
> know who he is but I know she works with him and he is married with 3 kids.
> What an asshole. Not only is he beening unfaithful and destroying his marriage,
> but he is trying to destroy ours also. I would love to find him. I wouldn't
> hurt him, but I bet his wife would love to know about all of this. I consider
> myself a lucky guy. None of my friends or close family members have every
> passed away. I have never had a girl break my heart. I have to say this is the
> worst pain I have ever experienced. I have found something so important that I
> will never stop fighting for it. She is the one. I know that.
>
> n2
>






SubjectRe: What is really important. new Reply to this message
Posted byJoffeman
Posted on08/04/06 11:33 AM



> He guys. Haven't been here for a few weeks. Through the years I come and go.
> I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful women - my soulmate. I have 3
> wonderful kids. At the beginning of this year I burried myself in work (started
> a company). I thought that if I could complete this one project, I could put
> our family ahead financially. While it might have done that, about two weeks
> ago, I learned that my wife has lost here love for me. She met a guy at her
> work and they have grown very close. I don't think she has cheated on me, but
> she does love him. Boy has this really put things in perspective for me. I
> love her more than anything - I am heartbroken. I left my 9-5 job at IBM last
> week so that I can focus on this. Everyday I focus on her and my kids. I am
> doing everything I can to win her back.

i wish you the best- a lot of guys are afraid to admit when they've neglected the things that are truly important to them, and even fewer actually try to sort it out.

> I consider myself a christian. I found
> god years ago but fell away since I thought I didn't need him. Since this has
> started, he brought me to my knees. I am not preeching to you about finding
> god. I pray everyday.

i'm glad that you find solace in your religion, and that you obviously see that prayer itself is best accompanied by action. i respect that, regardless of my own religious beliefs. i recommend you see pasolini's the gospel according to saint matthew. i find it beautiful & inspirational, and it's the most faithful film in spirit & execution to any book of the new or old testaments.

> Since this started, I would say that things are getting
> better. She is staying at home and even sleeps in my bed with me. We spent the
> day together. It was awesome. It's been so rough, I sometimes wish I could
> just leave. The though of her and this other guy makes my stomach ache. She
> will not admitt to this guy - guess she thinks it will hurt me too much. I don't
> know who he is but I know she works with him and he is married with 3 kids.

what dirt do you have on this guy? is she spending time with him outside of work, and if so, is she trying to hide that she does? did she give you the speech on 'things not working out', or did she just kinda drift away?

> What an asshole. Not only is he beening unfaithful and destroying his marriage,
> but he is trying to destroy ours also. I would love to find him. I wouldn't
> hurt him, but I bet his wife would love to know about all of this. I consider
> myself a lucky guy. None of my friends or close family members have every
> passed away. I have never had a girl break my heart. I have to say this is the
> worst pain I have ever experienced.

yeah that shit's no fun, mad painful.

>I have found something so important that I
> will never stop fighting for it. She is the one. I know that.

i know it sounds fruity, but have you been in the habit of telling her your emotions before now? if not, doing so may have a massive impact. being open & honest is really important when you wanna make shit right. knowing what's important and making effort is even more important, though, and as you've already begun to make large sacrifices, you're obviously serious about it.

also, get her a potted, flowering plant that isn't going to wither and die. bitches can't get enough of that type of shit.

j


SubjectStay strong and be positive new Reply to this message
Posted byJudgeInjury
Posted on08/04/06 12:37 PM



Chicks enjoy getting attention, and though it sucks, if they don't get it from who they should there are guys out there who will give it to them regardless of who they are attached to.

That said, if your wife is smart, which she is since she is married to a CA'er, she will realize this to be just a bump in the road and not something long term to go after. A married dude with three kids? That's such a real world anchor I can't imagine any woman looking past regardless whatever spiel he is selling.

Don't kill the guy either. It will do you no good. I know you didn't say anything about this, but I bet it has crossed your mind a lot (it did mine is a similar situation). If things somehow go bad and you are hurt over this for a long, long time...that's still way shorter than life in prison. And when you're 75 a girl breaking your heart won't mean anything.

But I think you'll win her love back. Just let her "figure out" that if this guy will do this to someone else and with 3 kids between them, why wouldn't he do it with her too later on?

Good luck, I'll pray for whoever the guy whose handles is n20carz.

And if you can burn the guy, do it. Turnabout is fairplay, let him reap what he's sowed.

Phil


SubjectRe: What is really important. new Reply to this message
Posted byskydoune
Posted on08/04/06 12:50 PM



You've been with her for 10 years, you have kids, and when you try getting a better job even if it means work, she'd rather flirt with other man instead of supporting you through this.

Wow, your marriage really mean something to her eh? Sorry but I can't see what you're doing wrong here. I know a guy who's working 7 days a week and almost never sees her girlfriend, yet, she loves him and support him through this rough times because their love is worth it.




SubjectGood luck n2o... new Reply to this message
Posted byDeath Knight
Posted on08/04/06 01:12 PM



It's hard that sometimes it takes a jarring experience to make us rethink our priorities, but it seems that it's helping you really get back in there, investing on what trully matters to you.

I wholeheartedly agree with what Joffe has said in here, and i trully hope you can patch things up with your love. I don't know what her feelings are, but i can tell from yours that she and your kids are trully the most important thing in your life, so i wish you the best of luck in trying to get things back on track.

Good luck my friend, everyone deserves happiness.

All work and no play makes me..., well, you know the rest.


SubjectGood news! new Reply to this message
Posted byEvildrak
Posted on08/04/06 07:41 PM



> I know what it feels like.
>
> The ex-GF and I are starting to get back together but now I wonder - will she do
> the same crap down the road? What about after we'd married? Trust is something
> you must have, without question. Love can't even make up for it.
>
>
>
>
>
> > He guys. Haven't been here for a few weeks. Through the years I come and go.
>
> > I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful women - my soulmate. I have 3
> > wonderful kids. At the beginning of this year I burried myself in work
> (started
> > a company). I thought that if I could complete this one project, I could put
> > our family ahead financially. While it might have done that, about two weeks
> > ago, I learned that my wife has lost here love for me. She met a guy at her
> > work and they have grown very close. I don't think she has cheated on me, but
> > she does love him. Boy has this really put things in perspective for me. I
> > love her more than anything - I am heartbroken. I left my 9-5 job at IBM last
> > week so that I can focus on this. Everyday I focus on her and my kids. I am
> > doing everything I can to win her back. I consider myself a christian. I
> found
> > god years ago but fell away since I thought I didn't need him. Since this has
> > started, he brought me to my knees. I am not preeching to you about finding
> > god. I pray everyday. Since this started, I would say that things are
> getting
> > better. She is staying at home and even sleeps in my bed with me. We spent
> the
> > day together. It was awesome. It's been so rough, I sometimes wish I could
> > just leave. The though of her and this other guy makes my stomach ache. She
> > will not admitt to this guy - guess she thinks it will hurt me too much. I
> don't
> > know who he is but I know she works with him and he is married with 3 kids.
> > What an asshole. Not only is he beening unfaithful and destroying his
> marriage,
> > but he is trying to destroy ours also. I would love to find him. I wouldn't
> > hurt him, but I bet his wife would love to know about all of this. I consider
> > myself a lucky guy. None of my friends or close family members have every
> > passed away. I have never had a girl break my heart. I have to say this is
> the
> > worst pain I have ever experienced. I have found something so important that
> I
> > will never stop fighting for it. She is the one. I know that.
> >
> > n2
> >
>
>
>
>
Good luck to you man, I knew she would.

--I dwell in the realm of possibility - Anything that can possibly go wrong, will go wrong!--


SubjectI have no useful advice new Reply to this message
Posted bywildcat
Posted on08/05/06 05:16 AM



(much like a fish giving you bicycling tips)

> He guys. Haven't been here for a few weeks. Through the years I come and go.
> I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful women - my soulmate. I have 3
> wonderful kids. At the beginning of this year I burried myself in work (started
> a company). I thought that if I could complete this one project, I could put
> our family ahead financially. While it might have done that, about two weeks
> ago, I learned that my wife has lost here love for me. She met a guy at her
> work and they have grown very close. I don't think she has cheated on me, but
> she does love him. Boy has this really put things in perspective for me. I
> love her more than anything - I am heartbroken. I left my 9-5 job at IBM last
> week so that I can focus on this. Everyday I focus on her and my kids. I am
> doing everything I can to win her back. I consider myself a christian. I found
> god years ago but fell away since I thought I didn't need him. Since this has
> started, he brought me to my knees. I am not preeching to you about finding
> god. I pray everyday. Since this started, I would say that things are getting
> better. She is staying at home and even sleeps in my bed with me. We spent the
> day together. It was awesome. It's been so rough, I sometimes wish I could
> just leave. The though of her and this other guy makes my stomach ache. She
> will not admitt to this guy - guess she thinks it will hurt me too much. I don't
> know who he is but I know she works with him and he is married with 3 kids.
> What an asshole. Not only is he beening unfaithful and destroying his marriage,
> but he is trying to destroy ours also. I would love to find him. I wouldn't
> hurt him, but I bet his wife would love to know about all of this. I consider
> myself a lucky guy. None of my friends or close family members have every
> passed away. I have never had a girl break my heart. I have to say this is the
> worst pain I have ever experienced. I have found something so important that I
> will never stop fighting for it. She is the one. I know that.

I don't mean to bag on you (but I have to keep my rep as a terrible person up), but she was probably feeling neglected or some such, found a friendly ear in this other guy, and one thing and another and here you are.

HOWEVER.

It sounds (from your narrative, to my ever-so-practiced mind) like she's willing to work things through. Give it some time, give it some work, and I think you guys'll pull through. <wapanese>Ganbatte kudasai.</wapanese>




Subjectwireless application protocol anese? [nt] Reply to this message
Posted byJoffeman
Posted on08/05/06 07:21 AM



you guys watch too many cartoons.

j


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