I just lost control of my bowels!

Let's get a system where Nintendo's primary goal is fucking off third party software and making games that haven't changed a single fucking ounce of their formula since they were released in the late nineties and charge full price for them for almost half a decade because they're the only fucking games worth buying in their whole shitty fucking library!!!

And you're going to be stupid enough to buy it again, fucktard. They're not innovators, they're assholes and they're making the videogaming world shitty. Their idea of the future of videogaming is fat people rug surfing on pieces of plastic, playing carnival games because they think it's going to help them avoid their inevitable diagnosis of diabetes and timely demise due to cardiac arrest.

Why am I so mad? Because I've been buying their shit for too long and the only way they can market there shit is to say, "HEY, IT'S FUCKING MARIO. YEAH, MARIO. YOU WILL BUY THIS STUPID FUCKING GAME BECAUSE I JUST SAID MARIO. HEY, IT'S THE 3DS. GUESS WHAT? WE'LL RE-RELEASE OCARINA OF TIME FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE A BRAINDEAD ZOMBIE WHO WILL KILL YOUR OWN OFFSPRING IF IT MEANT YOU COULD PLAY OCARINA OF TIME FOR 5 MINUTES. THEN IN 3 MONTHS WE'LL RE-RELEASE AGAIN EXCEPT THIS TIME WITH THE MASTER QUEST. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"

Fuck Zelda, fuck Mario, fuck Nintendo.

pixel-eight.com

You are on quite the ranting rampage today... You say this shit like nintendo is the only douchebag that does this... microsoft meet halo... sony meet gran turismo or metal gear solid...

Those games are all essentially the same bullshit rehashed into a 60 dollar plastic box... Other then sound angry about it you just stated I am right with no backing.

I don't know about you but mario galaxy was quite the change from sunshine... zelda can never change though... if you change it then it wouldn't be zelda anymore, i could care less if that whole franchise died... but anyways, all games are exactly that... just rehashing of known shit. I don't know about you, but it makes me sick when someone buys street fighter super high defination third power super series 17...

Hell now I am more on your side lol.

> I just lost control of my bowels!
>
> Let's get a system where Nintendo's primary goal is fucking off third party
> software and making games that haven't changed a single fucking ounce of their
> formula since they were released in the late nineties and charge full price for
> them for almost half a decade because they're the only fucking games worth
> buying in their whole shitty fucking library!!!
>
> And you're going to be stupid enough to buy it again, fucktard. They're not
> innovators, they're assholes and they're making the videogaming world shitty.
> Their idea of the future of videogaming is fat people rug surfing on pieces of
> plastic, playing carnival games because they think it's going to help them avoid
> their inevitable diagnosis of diabetes and timely demise due to cardiac arrest.
>
> Why am I so mad? Because I've been buying their shit for too long and the only
> way they can market there shit is to say, "HEY, IT'S FUCKING MARIO. YEAH,
> MARIO. YOU WILL BUY THIS STUPID FUCKING GAME BECAUSE I JUST SAID MARIO. HEY,
> IT'S THE 3DS. GUESS WHAT? WE'LL RE-RELEASE OCARINA OF TIME FOR THE MILLIONTH
> TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE A BRAINDEAD ZOMBIE WHO WILL KILL YOUR OWN OFFSPRING IF IT
> MEANT YOU COULD PLAY OCARINA OF TIME FOR 5 MINUTES. THEN IN 3 MONTHS WE'LL
> RE-RELEASE AGAIN EXCEPT THIS TIME WITH THE MASTER QUEST. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"
>
> Fuck Zelda, fuck Mario, fuck Nintendo.
>
> pixel-eight.com
>

> I just lost control of my bowels!
>
> Let's get a system where Nintendo's primary goal is fucking off third party
> software and making games that haven't changed a single fucking ounce of their
> formula since they were released in the late nineties and charge full price for
> them for almost half a decade because they're the only fucking games worth
> buying in their whole shitty fucking library!!!
>
> And you're going to be stupid enough to buy it again, fucktard. They're not
> innovators, they're assholes and they're making the videogaming world shitty.
> Their idea of the future of videogaming is fat people rug surfing on pieces of
> plastic, playing carnival games because they think it's going to help them avoid
> their inevitable diagnosis of diabetes and timely demise due to cardiac arrest.
>
> Why am I so mad? Because I've been buying their shit for too long and the only
> way they can market there shit is to say, "HEY, IT'S FUCKING MARIO. YEAH,
> MARIO. YOU WILL BUY THIS STUPID FUCKING GAME BECAUSE I JUST SAID MARIO. HEY,
> IT'S THE 3DS. GUESS WHAT? WE'LL RE-RELEASE OCARINA OF TIME FOR THE MILLIONTH
> TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE A BRAINDEAD ZOMBIE WHO WILL KILL YOUR OWN OFFSPRING IF IT
> MEANT YOU COULD PLAY OCARINA OF TIME FOR 5 MINUTES. THEN IN 3 MONTHS WE'LL
> RE-RELEASE AGAIN EXCEPT THIS TIME WITH THE MASTER QUEST. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"
>
> Fuck Zelda, fuck Mario, fuck Nintendo.
>
> pixel-eight.com
>

> You are on quite the ranting rampage today... You say this shit like nintendo is
> the only douchebag that does this... microsoft meet halo... sony meet gran
> turismo or metal gear solid...

At least MGS is third party rehash.

Nintendo isn't even trying anymore. 'Hey, here's a Zelda that we wrote and produced over 10 years ago. We've released it on N64, Gamecube, DS, Wii, and NOW! Buy it again on 3DS'.

> Nintendo isn't even trying anymore. 'Hey, here's a Zelda that we wrote and produced over 10 years ago. We've released it on N64, Gamecube, DS, Wii, and
> NOW! Buy it again on 3DS'.
>

The Zelda series started on the NES.

OoT was released on the N64, 'Cube, Wii as a download, and 3DS. I don't remember OoT coming out for the DS?

BTW How do you feel about the "Retro" arcade games being released on almost every system ever made, is that ok?



The new and improved King of Lamers 2003!

>
> > Nintendo isn't even trying anymore. 'Hey, here's a Zelda that we wrote and
> produced over 10 years ago. We've released it on N64, Gamecube, DS, Wii, and
> > NOW! Buy it again on 3DS'.
> >
>
> The Zelda series started on the NES.
>
> OoT was released on the N64, 'Cube, Wii as a download, and 3DS. I don't remember
> OoT coming out for the DS?
>
> BTW How do you feel about the "Retro" arcade games being released on almost
> every system ever made, is that ok?
>
>
>
> The new and improved King of Lamers 2003!
>

Yep, I do, in point of fact, realize where Zelda got its start. I still have the cart sitting on my shelf.

I suppose the releases for Wii and GC are comparable to a remake of an arcade game that is 5-10 dollars, but this 3DS one is going to be full price. This also isn't the first 'lets just re-release a game at full price' trick they've pulled either. Zelda 3 for GBA, Mario 64 for the DS, Starfox for the GBA, Pilotwings for the 3DS is just the flight levels from Wii Sports Resort. These would all be fine if they were $10 or $15 when they were re-released, but they were all full bore.

Nintendo is taking a page from the Book of Square.

I still can't get over what was shown at E3:

Microsoft led off with the aforementioned Modern Warfare 3, which is really Call of Duty 8. Next was Tomb Raider 10 (rebooted as Tomb Raider). Then we had Mass Effect 3, and Ghost Recon 11 (titled Ghost Recon: Future Soldier). This was followed by Gears of War 3, Forza 4 and Fable 4 (called Fable: The Journey). Halo 4 is actually Halo 7. Which means they intend to put out at least nine Halo games before they're done. Also announced a gritty reboot of the decade-old Halo to make it an even 10.


Sony came up next and announced a sequel, another sequel and then a reboot. After that it went sequel, sequel, special edition of a sequel, new FPS, sequel, new FPS, sequel, special edition of a sequel, new game based on an existing property (Star Trek), sequel, sequel and sequel. Then they introduced a new system (the PS Vita) and showed it off with four sequels.


Nintendo's list went: sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel, sequel and (hold on, let me double check here) a sequel. And you already know what those were, even if you haven't played a video game in 15 years: Mario Kart, Mario World, Luigi, Zelda, Kirby, etc. Then they showed off their new system (the Wii U) with a demo reel promising that some day it would allow us to play sequels like Arkham Asylum 2, Darksiders II and Ninja Gaiden 3.

Is this completely unprecedented? I know we can't expect something new every year but this year seems particulary rehashed.

I'll still buy half of these games and play them, I just wish they would focus their energies on new stuff too.

asdf

> > I just lost control of my bowels!
> >
> > Let's get a system where Nintendo's primary goal is fucking off third party
> > software and making games that haven't changed a single fucking ounce of their
> > formula since they were released in the late nineties and charge full price
> for
> > them for almost half a decade because they're the only fucking games worth
> > buying in their whole shitty fucking library!!!
> >
> > And you're going to be stupid enough to buy it again, fucktard. They're not
> > innovators, they're assholes and they're making the videogaming world shitty.
> > Their idea of the future of videogaming is fat people rug surfing on pieces of
> > plastic, playing carnival games because they think it's going to help them
> avoid
> > their inevitable diagnosis of diabetes and timely demise due to cardiac
> arrest.
> >
> > Why am I so mad? Because I've been buying their shit for too long and the
> only
> > way they can market there shit is to say, "HEY, IT'S FUCKING MARIO. YEAH,
> > MARIO. YOU WILL BUY THIS STUPID FUCKING GAME BECAUSE I JUST SAID MARIO. HEY,
> > IT'S THE 3DS. GUESS WHAT? WE'LL RE-RELEASE OCARINA OF TIME FOR THE MILLIONTH
> > TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE A BRAINDEAD ZOMBIE WHO WILL KILL YOUR OWN OFFSPRING IF IT
> > MEANT YOU COULD PLAY OCARINA OF TIME FOR 5 MINUTES. THEN IN 3 MONTHS WE'LL
> > RE-RELEASE AGAIN EXCEPT THIS TIME WITH THE MASTER QUEST. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"
>
> >
> > Fuck Zelda, fuck Mario, fuck Nintendo.
> >
> > pixel-eight.com
> >
>

pixel-eight.com

I think I'm bothered the most because Nintendo's rehash train started waaaay earlier than anyone and has spanned a half dozen hardware platform and every hardware platform is built on the same exact set of games. For example N64, Gamecube, DS, and Wii...4 systems that were built entirely on the same goddam games that were re-released for each platform in a number of creatively bullshity ways, each time asking you to cough up full price.

I was stupid enough to think the Wii brought new blood to the formula and I was ENTIRELY wrong. It was almost a perfect creature...it made third party titles that were *so* awful and so reprehensible that the ONLY games "worth" getting were the Nintendo titles. It was genius. Case in point, here is a list of the Wii's best selling titles...

http://www.listal.com/list/bestselling-wii-games

Nintendo rules the top 10 best selling games and a third party title doesn't enter the list until place 13. I was in denial but I get it now. This is the shape of things on a Nintendo platform. I bought the Wii and its only function is to stream video from Netflix. The Wii U can eat shit and fucking die.

pixel-eight.com

Yeah, you could have mentioned Chrono Trigger on the DS for $40 as well.

Companies will charge what they think they can get for games. I don't like it either, but if gamers don't like it they don't have to buy the games.



The new and improved King of Lamers 2003!

Your argument has little to no merit if you're just singling out Nintendo as everyone damn well does it and has for a long time. At least Nintendo has a high track record of not having their long run franchises turning the shit like most others have annoyingly so (Sonic is a fantastic example of how to go wrong in the most ways possible.)

Also if you're going to rip em for Mario, Zelda, and the rest all in one freaking year on 3DS...blame 3rd parties. They gave them the entire Wii life and a good bit of the DS to do the right thing and not fuck them over giving wide amounts of time for good games to come out, giving them holidays, giving help developing and it mostly has come back in their faces and with a kick to the nuts...repeatedly. I can't blame em, and as played out as some of their stuff is some still does remain fresh thankfully enough to still bother with it.

And guess what I did get Ocarina again, it's my 2nd copy and I haven't touched it since 1998 so I don't give a fuck as it's new after this long as I can't remember shit about it, and it's portable which helps with how my life is now.

If you don't like it, don't buy it.



Billy Connolly - Statement of the Century
"If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time ?"

> I just lost control of my bowels!
>
> Let's get a system where Nintendo's primary goal is fucking off third party
> software and making games that haven't changed a single fucking ounce of their
> formula since they were released in the late nineties and charge full price for
> them for almost half a decade because they're the only fucking games worth
> buying in their whole shitty fucking library!!!
>
> And you're going to be stupid enough to buy it again, fucktard. They're not
> innovators, they're assholes and they're making the videogaming world shitty.
> Their idea of the future of videogaming is fat people rug surfing on pieces of
> plastic, playing carnival games because they think it's going to help them avoid
> their inevitable diagnosis of diabetes and timely demise due to cardiac arrest.
>
> Why am I so mad? Because I've been buying their shit for too long and the only
> way they can market there shit is to say, "HEY, IT'S FUCKING MARIO. YEAH,
> MARIO. YOU WILL BUY THIS STUPID FUCKING GAME BECAUSE I JUST SAID MARIO. HEY,
> IT'S THE 3DS. GUESS WHAT? WE'LL RE-RELEASE OCARINA OF TIME FOR THE MILLIONTH
> TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE A BRAINDEAD ZOMBIE WHO WILL KILL YOUR OWN OFFSPRING IF IT
> MEANT YOU COULD PLAY OCARINA OF TIME FOR 5 MINUTES. THEN IN 3 MONTHS WE'LL
> RE-RELEASE AGAIN EXCEPT THIS TIME WITH THE MASTER QUEST. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"
>
> Fuck Zelda, fuck Mario, fuck Nintendo.
>
> pixel-eight.com
>



you're taking a break from call of duty 27 and battlefield 16 to post this?

Everyone shits on street fighter, but there was a gap between Street Fighter Three THird Strike and Street Fighter 4 by approximately 10-12 years. Fighting games took a revision nosedive from the big three for quite some time (Capcom, SNK, Namco). In the 90s, new street fighter revisions were goddamned awful because in some parts of the world (Canada here), they would charge 80-100 bucks a fuckin' cartridge.