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> > Michael Bay has made a film on par with Uwe Boll's in the name of the king > imo. > > I think in all truth many episodes of the cartoon, a show made only to sell > > toys, made A LOT more sense. Compared to this, the animated film looks like > > Citizen Kane. > > > > It starts off awful, and just keeps digging. You have a robot with a beard, a > > robot get choked, robots spray out red fluids like blood repeatedly, people > > climbing up buildings just to jump off with flying squirrel suits for no other > > reason than just to do that... In fact, there are so many set pieces in the > film > > (guys come up out of water with guns, monster hiding behind column so you stay > > quiet, guy looks at girl while describing curves on a car, guys in plane watch > > as others around them get shot down, and on and on) that it almost seems like > a > > montage taken from lots of other movies or perhaps a failed parody. > > > > They actually have Leonard Nimoy paraphrase one of his most famous lines from > > Star Trek, but just flip it around since he's evil! Who writes like that? I > > didn't actually see him twiddle his mustache (which he totally has) but it > > wouldn't have been out of place in this wreck of a film. > > > > There are no likeable characters in the entire film. Not one. Take Optimus > > Prime; he's either ripping off King Leonidas (slow-mo sword attack and all) or > a > > gigantic retard, at one point getting tangled up in wires and requiring others > > to cut him down like a stuck kite. He does something stupid or wrong nearly > half > > the time he is on screen, and spouts gems like "Mankind have given up on the > > autobots, but you must never give up on yourselves." > > > > The cincher has to be when Optimus Prime, hero of our childhood, shooting an > > unarmed, injured, elderly opponent point blank in the back of the head, then > > TURNS HIM over so he can point blank shoot him in the face then stand proudly > in > > front of a ruined cityscape with an American flag waving in the background. > It's > > like a scene from Team America with robots. > > > > Just such a bad, bad, bad, bad film... > > > > > Buy my Music, it's cheap! >
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