How come things like that get out in public anyway. I mean if all those discussion on irc are done in private channels with only the people that need to know involved things wouldn't get so bad cause people wouldn't know and wouldn't start writing or giving comments about it on any msgboard.
Of course it's possible that someone just turns their back on you or that backstabbing still occurs but u just deal with it in a private matter without the public knowing. Even if that person attacks publicly just ignore him, eventually noone will listen to him and he'll be forgotten after a few weeks anyway. (not pointing fingers at anyone cause i got no clue about the whole affair, but generally speaking)